Thursday, February 16, 2012

Another child?

After having your first child, having another can seem such a big decision. This is especially if you have been sleep deprived for a while. Sleep deprivation makes you go back and forth in your decision about having more children. I have had friends who have advised that if I'm sleep deprived, I should have another one since I'm not getting much sleep anyway. However, my reasoning is I couldn't deal with any less sleep than what I'm getting at the moment. Some parents are amazing to put up with even less sleep with another child.

So, when is a good time to have another child? Some parents like a very close age gap of about 1 year and some between 2-3 years. I know of a mother who, shortly after giving birth to her first child, talked about having another. I couldn't imagine myself doing that as I was learning the ropes of being a mother, was exhausted but was also grappling with the lack of my own personal time and space. But as we're all different in our ways, we know what we can or can't cope.

The discussion about having another child is often out of our hands, especially for us. We didn't fall pregnant with Miss P quickly. It took us 18 months and a laparoscopy operation and 3 months after that, it resulted in the desired lines in the pregnancy test. What joy!

Yet when talk of another child came up between Mr B and I, we were hesitant. Miss P hadn't been sleeping consistently well. Some nights were better than others. Some other nights were quite disastrous. There was a period where she would wake at midnight or 2am and then it'll take us between 2-4 hours to get her back to sleep. We were like zombies!! Did we want another child?

However, since it took so long with Miss P, we thought we better start thinking about no. 2. And believe it or not, within a few months, we've fallen pregnant. So different this time! And perhaps I should say here that it's the reason I've not been blogging as regularly as I like. Pregnancy nausea and tiredness haven't been great. Even though the nausea is still lingering, I must have gotten used to it because I don't feel as down about it as I was at the start of this pregnancy. Bub no. 2 is due in early July.....and we can't wait!

Was having another child a big decision for you? Was it a difficult or easy one?

1 comment:

  1. We've recently decided to try for another baby after being steadfastly against it for practical reasons for about a year (have 18mo). Decided to let hearts rule instead of heads but now find ourselves in gearing up to a 5th cycle, which is quite confronting given am in my late 30s & beginning to think that maybe it's not going to happen for us after all, after SO much heart-wrenching discussion! I'm glad I did all the one child family research as I am not worried about my daughter should we not manage to have another, altho I would dearly love another one. What will be will be and I'm at peace with our decision to try again, whatever happens, as we will always know that we have tried, so there can be no regrets. That said, when do we STOP trying is now the is never simple! :)


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